1
00:00:02,070 --> 00:00:03,204
[knocking on door]

2
00:00:04,138 --> 00:00:04,938
Okay, that's Mookie for
the rent money.

3
00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:07,475
I just found two fives
in the couch!

4
00:00:07,575 --> 00:00:09,677
Which brings us to
5, 10, carry the one...

5
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:12,580
a new low.

6
00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:14,082
Hello,
I'm Murray.

7
00:00:14,182 --> 00:00:16,484
Did you order
curry in a hurry?

8
00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:18,552
I don't know.
Is it paid for?

9
00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:19,553
Yeah.

10
00:00:19,653 --> 00:00:23,224
Then, yes, we did.

11
00:00:23,324 --> 00:00:24,692
Max, you're awful.

12
00:00:24,792 --> 00:00:26,194
We didn't pay for that.

13
00:00:26,294 --> 00:00:27,361
It's Indian food.

14
00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:30,698
We'll pay for it
in three hours.

15
00:00:30,798 --> 00:00:33,167
Any samosas in there?

16
00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:34,702
You want some naan?

17
00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:38,372
'Cause whoever ordered it
ain't gettin' naan.

18
00:00:38,472 --> 00:00:41,442
[knock on door]

19
00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:45,513
Did you guys see Murray
with our curry in a hurry?

20
00:00:45,613 --> 00:00:48,182
Nope, sorry.

21
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:52,353
(Peter Bjorn and John)
* Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

22
00:00:52,453 --> 00:00:54,122
[cash register bell dings]

23
00:00:54,222 --> 00:00:57,625
* Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

24
00:01:00,661 --> 00:01:03,264
Just a heads up,
the samosas are a little dry

25
00:01:03,364 --> 00:01:06,134
and also completely gone.

26
00:01:06,234 --> 00:01:08,202
I need all
the energy I can get.

27
00:01:08,336 --> 00:01:10,604
Sophie and I are doin' it
'round the clock.

28
00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:12,206
She wants a baby so bad,

29
00:01:12,340 --> 00:01:16,144
she even got an ovulation app
on her phone.

30
00:01:16,244 --> 00:01:19,147
Sophie's phone has
a fertility app?

31
00:01:19,247 --> 00:01:22,216
My phone's so old
it can't get pregnant.

32
00:01:22,350 --> 00:01:24,218
Tells us when
she's most fertile.

33
00:01:24,352 --> 00:01:27,688
Actually, a little
cartoon monkey tells us.

34
00:01:27,788 --> 00:01:29,157
What's his name?

35
00:01:29,257 --> 00:01:32,092
Overly curious George?

36
00:01:32,193 --> 00:01:34,662
[monkey screeching]

37
00:01:34,762 --> 00:01:37,831
Oleg, it's time.
See?

38
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:42,303
The monkey's got a boner.

39
00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:45,706
I'm pretty sure
that's a banana.

40
00:01:45,806 --> 00:01:49,410
It's yellow and he's holding it.
It's a boner.

41
00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:52,246
Sophie,
don't get your hopes up.

42
00:01:52,346 --> 00:01:53,247
We've had so much sex,

43
00:01:53,347 --> 00:01:56,850
it's basically just
steam coming out now.

44
00:01:56,950 --> 00:02:00,120
Oh, you found the food.
Good.

45
00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:02,323
You mind if I use
your stomach as a tray

46
00:02:02,423 --> 00:02:04,792
so I can eat while
we do it?

47
00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:08,596
Do I ever mind?

48
00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:11,732
I have to block out so much now
just to get through the day.

49
00:02:11,832 --> 00:02:12,800
[knock on door]

50
00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,668
Wow, we have
more visitors than

51
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:19,840
a mildly attractive prostitute
at Comic-Con.

52
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,275
(Mookie)
It's Mookie for the rent.

53
00:02:21,409 --> 00:02:23,277
Okay, Max,
this time can you do

54
00:02:23,377 --> 00:02:25,279
the blow-it-up hand
thing with him?

55
00:02:25,413 --> 00:02:28,282
I've tried it, but I'm just not
good at hand stuff.

56
00:02:29,817 --> 00:02:32,686
Ask anyone at Yale PREP.

57
00:02:32,786 --> 00:02:34,154
Just give it a shot!

58
00:02:35,389 --> 00:02:36,824
You also thought you couldn't
eat food that's been stepped on.

59
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,559
Look at you now.

60
00:02:41,695 --> 00:02:43,497
Sup, ladies?
Sorry I'm late.

61
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:45,466
Some guy threw
a cat at me.

62
00:02:45,566 --> 00:02:47,601
Who's gonna blow it up
for me?

63
00:02:47,701 --> 00:02:49,637
I'm not allowed
to blow stuff up anymore.

64
00:02:49,737 --> 00:02:54,842
My parole officer's rules,
not mine.

65
00:02:54,942 --> 00:02:58,346
[imitates explosion noise]

66
00:03:02,383 --> 00:03:04,885
I know that was bad.
I'm sorry.

67
00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:06,754
Is there a class I can take?

68
00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:09,189
I'll go get the last
of the rent money.

69
00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:12,192
It's either in my bra pile,
or I don't have it.

70
00:03:12,293 --> 00:03:14,462
Take your time.
We cool.

71
00:03:14,595 --> 00:03:18,266
So, what kind of name is
"Mookie"?

72
00:03:18,366 --> 00:03:19,199
Is it short for something?

73
00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:20,868
Long for something?

74
00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:24,204
Max, hurry up, girl.

75
00:03:24,305 --> 00:03:25,873
Okay,
you should have $800

76
00:03:26,006 --> 00:03:27,341
and here's the last of it.

77
00:03:27,475 --> 00:03:29,209
Sweet.
Well, I gotta go.

78
00:03:29,343 --> 00:03:31,379
I got a tennis lesson.

79
00:03:31,479 --> 00:03:35,215
Caroline,
wanna try again?

80
00:03:35,349 --> 00:03:37,518
[imitates explosion]

81
00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,753
Make sure you get
the whole $825.

82
00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:41,889
No funny business down there,
gangsta.

83
00:03:42,022 --> 00:03:45,393
825?
The rent is 850.

84
00:03:45,493 --> 00:03:47,495
No, always been 825.

85
00:03:47,628 --> 00:03:50,698
What's going
on now?

86
00:03:50,798 --> 00:03:54,268
Max, why do you tell me
the rent's 850 if it's 825?

87
00:03:54,368 --> 00:03:57,271
Oh, yeah,
I'ma go ahead and--

88
00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,239
good luck with that.

89
00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:03,411
You've been
overcharging me rent?

90
00:04:03,511 --> 00:04:04,978
It's not like that.

91
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,246
How is it not like that?

92
00:04:06,380 --> 00:04:07,815
Okay, it's exactly like that.

93
00:04:12,853 --> 00:04:15,255
Seriously, Max,
other than the rent,

94
00:04:15,356 --> 00:04:18,392
what else have you not been
telling the truth about?

95
00:04:18,492 --> 00:04:23,297
You probably didn't even see
Emma Stone at Costco.

96
00:04:23,397 --> 00:04:26,667
And is Max Black
even your real name?

97
00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,303
It's a real name.

98
00:04:29,403 --> 00:04:29,937
Hey, in my defense,

99
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:31,972
you do have a bigger bedroom.

100
00:04:32,072 --> 00:04:36,577
That's because I sleep
in the living room.

101
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,846
Can you just let this go?

102
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:40,981
So I took a little
off the top.

103
00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:42,716
Everybody takes
a little off the top.

104
00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:45,353
Look what God did to Han.

105
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:52,993
Don't drag me into the middle
of Pretty Little Liars.

106
00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:57,331
I've got two ferrets at home
with the stomach flu,

107
00:04:57,431 --> 00:04:58,966
and I don't need it.

108
00:04:59,066 --> 00:05:01,335
Now everyone stop
what you're not doing.

109
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:03,637
I'm calling
an emergency staff meeting.

110
00:05:03,737 --> 00:05:05,305
Is this the whole,

111
00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:09,443
"Don't ice your junk
in the food sink" thing again?

112
00:05:09,577 --> 00:05:11,311
No, I have a rule.

113
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:14,515
20 warnings,
then it's a dead issue.

114
00:05:14,615 --> 00:05:16,717
This is about all of you.

115
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:18,852
We need to talk about
diner teamwork.

116
00:05:18,952 --> 00:05:20,721
Oh, our teamwork's fine.

117
00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:22,590
For example,
we're covering for Earl

118
00:05:22,690 --> 00:05:24,324
while he chases
the ice cream man.

119
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:29,397
* Got me a Chaco Taco

120
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:33,767
Everybody, sit down.

121
00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:36,770
Why?
So we can be eye level?

122
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:41,542
Good put-down,
Caroline.

123
00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:44,344
See, Han?
Teamwork.

124
00:05:44,445 --> 00:05:46,480
All right, listen
to our latest Yelp reviews.

125
00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:47,615
Daryl B. says,

126
00:05:48,716 --> 00:05:50,484
"Sat in booth an hour
before anyone talked to me.

127
00:05:50,584 --> 00:05:51,952
"When someone did,

128
00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:54,522
it was the waitress
asking me for water."

129
00:05:56,557 --> 00:05:59,059
I was thirsty!

130
00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:03,631
And Daryl B. was real slow
with that water.

131
00:06:03,764 --> 00:06:06,400
You don't see me
Yelping about it.

132
00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:07,901
I'll read one.

133
00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:10,504
Caroline C. from here says,

134
00:06:10,638 --> 00:06:16,510
"Max has been overcharging me
$25 a month for four years."

135
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:20,548
That sounds made up.

136
00:06:20,648 --> 00:06:23,551
So tomorrow night,
I'm closing the diner,

137
00:06:23,651 --> 00:06:26,920
and we're all working on
our team building skills.

138
00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:28,388
So no one cares that

139
00:06:28,522 --> 00:06:31,459
Max has been stealing
$25 a month from me?

140
00:06:31,559 --> 00:06:33,927
That's correct.

141
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:37,097
[rock music]

142
00:06:37,197 --> 00:06:38,666
*

143
00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:39,700
Right this way.

144
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,936
What the hell is this place?

145
00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:44,805
This looks like
the room I was kept in

146
00:06:44,938 --> 00:06:48,075
when that trucker
borrowed me for three days.

147
00:06:50,678 --> 00:06:53,413
Did you overcharge him too?

148
00:06:54,682 --> 00:06:57,818
You'll all find out
where we are soon enough.

149
00:06:57,918 --> 00:06:59,753
All part of the adventure,

150
00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:02,490
and the mystery,
and the--

151
00:07:02,590 --> 00:07:04,424
did I say adventure?

152
00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:06,627
Oh no, this isn't
one of those escape rooms

153
00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:07,895
where they lock you in a room

154
00:07:07,995 --> 00:07:09,863
and you have to work
as a team to get out?

155
00:07:09,963 --> 00:07:11,565
Welcome to the Escape Room,

156
00:07:11,665 --> 00:07:13,567
where we lock you in a room,

157
00:07:13,667 --> 00:07:16,870
and you have to work as
a team to get out.

158
00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:19,740
And so it begins!

159
00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:23,577
What?
Us beating the crap out of you?

160
00:07:23,711 --> 00:07:26,480
Together, of course.

161
00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:36,123
Now let me get this straight.

162
00:07:36,223 --> 00:07:41,862
Y'all are volunteering to be
locked up in a tiny room?

163
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:45,866
See now, that's some
white people stuff right there.

164
00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:51,038
It's a fun way
for us all to learn

165
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:53,541
how to work together
to solve a problem.

166
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:56,610
If the group of us could work
together to solve a problem,

167
00:07:56,744 --> 00:08:01,081
you'd be back in Korea.

168
00:08:01,181 --> 00:08:03,617
I'm in no rush to
get home to Sophie.

169
00:08:03,751 --> 00:08:05,553
I mean,
I love her and she's a fox,

170
00:08:05,653 --> 00:08:07,788
but baby-making is brutal.

171
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:12,560
I'm so tired of having
my legs up in the air.

172
00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:16,630
How do you--
What do you--

173
00:08:16,764 --> 00:08:19,499
How would that--
Let's just move past it.

174
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,635
Sign these waivers saying that

175
00:08:21,735 --> 00:08:23,537
if anything happens to you,

176
00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:26,106
it is entirely your fault.

177
00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:28,642
Nobody's signing these waivers.
We're not idiots.

178
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:30,544
We're gonna read through
all the fine print.

179
00:08:30,644 --> 00:08:31,545
(all)
Done.

180
00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,947
Here you go.

181
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:36,650
Oh, well, I'm gonna
read mine anyway.

182
00:08:36,784 --> 00:08:37,918
Caroline reads everything.

183
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:41,054
She read the entire iTunes
user agreement before she bought

184
00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:44,825
Rihanna's
"Bitch Better Have My Money."

185
00:08:44,925 --> 00:08:46,727
Wish I'd read the fine print
when I agreed

186
00:08:46,827 --> 00:08:47,928
to be your roommate.

187
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:51,599
Turns out,
bitch do have my money.

188
00:08:51,699 --> 00:08:53,934
Do I have to escape
from this too?

189
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:57,270
I mean, is this
part of the game?

190
00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:58,672
Is this a bad time
to tell you

191
00:08:58,806 --> 00:09:01,942
your horse masterminded
the whole thing?

192
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:04,244
Before we start,
I need to collect your phones

193
00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:06,680
so you can't Google answers.

194
00:09:06,814 --> 00:09:07,948
Don't look at my screensaver

195
00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:09,817
unless you have
a strong stomach.

196
00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:11,551
I've seen lots of phones.

197
00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:12,820
It takes a lot to shock--
Aah!

198
00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:17,591
Why are your legs up?

199
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,696
Ah, white light means it's a go.

200
00:09:22,830 --> 00:09:24,598
Hey, hold up!
Aah!

201
00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:26,867
Oh, one second.

202
00:09:26,967 --> 00:09:28,702
You know,
I'm breathin' harder

203
00:09:28,836 --> 00:09:32,305
than Paula Deen on
Dancing with the Stars.

204
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:36,710
Sophie?

205
00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:38,712
How did you find me here?

206
00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:39,847
I told you to take that

207
00:09:39,947 --> 00:09:42,650
"Find My Husband" app
off your phone.

208
00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:45,285
Yeah, well...
I didn't.

209
00:09:45,385 --> 00:09:48,188
Yeah.
We're trying to make a baby.

210
00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:50,724
Sophie,
you can't be here right now.

211
00:09:50,858 --> 00:09:52,660
This is
a work team-building thing

212
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:53,794
and you're not part of the team.

213
00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:56,730
Right, Han?
- She can stay.

214
00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:59,800
She does as much
at the diner as the girls do.

215
00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,601
Well, I gotta stay
close to Oleg.

216
00:10:01,735 --> 00:10:03,637
You know, the monkey's
unpredictable.

217
00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:07,274
You never know when
he's gonna demand intercourse.

218
00:10:08,876 --> 00:10:11,278
Well, that's a fun wrinkle.

219
00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:15,883
Okay, this is the whitest thing
I've ever seen,

220
00:10:16,016 --> 00:10:19,619
and I've seen those shoes
that have toes.

221
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:24,157
(Earl)
Oh, hell no.

222
00:10:24,257 --> 00:10:27,895
(Caroline)
I'm feeling angry, scared,
and both of Max's boobs.

223
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,799
(Max)
Is this our version
of make-up sex?

224
00:10:31,899 --> 00:10:34,067
(Sophie)
I can't see a thing!

225
00:10:34,167 --> 00:10:38,839
Here, let me use
my pepper spray flashlight.

226
00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:40,774
Aw.
[pepper spray fizzes]

227
00:10:40,908 --> 00:10:44,077
(Han)
Aah!

228
00:10:44,177 --> 00:10:46,814
(Max)
Hey, I'm starting
to like this now.

229
00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:52,352
(Sophie)
Hey! Look at all
those kooky light switches!

230
00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:55,689
Let's try that!

231
00:10:55,789 --> 00:10:57,725
Whoever this guy
is says,

232
00:10:57,825 --> 00:11:00,961
"Choose correctly
or lost five minutes."

233
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:05,665
(Max)
Wow, you're no whoever
that guy is, Oleg.

234
00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:11,004
(Han)
10, 20, 26 switches!
What other things are 26?

235
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:15,709
(Caroline)
Hmm, that's one more dollar than
Max has been stealing from me.

236
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:17,845
(Han)
How about something
a little more universal

237
00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:20,814
and a lot less annoying?

238
00:11:20,948 --> 00:11:22,750
(Oleg)
There are 26 letters in
the alphabet.

239
00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:25,685
Thank you, Comrade Kangaroo.

240
00:11:25,786 --> 00:11:30,423
(Caroline)
Okay, 26 letters.
Which one could represent light?

241
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:31,959
(Han)
Light starts with "L"!

242
00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:36,730
(Sophie)
Oh, wow, he's good!

243
00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:40,133
(Caroline)
Too easy. It's Einstein so
the answer must be scientific.

244
00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:43,971
Wait, in Einstein's famous
formula E=mc2,

245
00:11:44,104 --> 00:11:47,140
the speed of light is
represented by the letter "C."

246
00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,277
A...B...C.

247
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:52,913
[gasping]

248
00:11:53,013 --> 00:11:55,415
Oh, it's
Alice in Wonderland themed!

249
00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:56,716
I'll be great at this.

250
00:11:56,817 --> 00:11:58,451
It was always my favorite story.

251
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:02,289
Sophie and I only watch
the hard-core porno version.

252
00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:05,859
Yeah, it was called
Alice in Underpants.

253
00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:08,395
And our dentist was in it!

254
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:09,863
[in British accent]
That's enough

255
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:10,798
of all your chatter!

256
00:12:11,131 --> 00:12:14,868
It's time to listen
to the Mad Hatter.

257
00:12:15,002 --> 00:12:18,806
I think it's the same guy
as before.

258
00:12:18,906 --> 00:12:21,875
Oh...
Wow.

259
00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:24,077
He's a genius!

260
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:29,316
You filled this room
with illumination,

261
00:12:29,416 --> 00:12:33,753
but you are not done
with this situation.

262
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:38,025
What rhymes with
"kick in the crotch"?

263
00:12:38,158 --> 00:12:40,027
To proceed
and be done with me,

264
00:12:40,127 --> 00:12:43,163
you must answer
these riddles three.

265
00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:46,834
Y'all know I'm 80, right?

266
00:12:46,934 --> 00:12:49,469
One: Take it out
of the package.

267
00:12:49,569 --> 00:12:50,838
It goes in your mouth.

268
00:12:50,938 --> 00:12:54,908
Chew it too long,
and it will go south.

269
00:12:55,042 --> 00:12:57,510
It's what Earl's
doing right now.

270
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,847
Oh, Lord,
am I peeing?

271
00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:01,949
No, he's chewing gum.

272
00:13:02,049 --> 00:13:04,184
"Take it out of the package.
It goes in your mouth.

273
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,786
Chew it too long
and it'll go south." Gum.

274
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:08,355
Exactamente.

275
00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:09,923
That wasn't too hard.

276
00:13:10,057 --> 00:13:12,192
Put your answer onto this card.

277
00:13:12,325 --> 00:13:13,360
Well done!

278
00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:16,930
This Groupon has already paid
for itself.

279
00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:20,133
Two:
Arnold Schwarzenegger's is big;

280
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,269
Michael J. Fox's is small;

281
00:13:22,369 --> 00:13:25,205
the Pope has one
but doesn't use it;

282
00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:28,075
Madonna doesn't
have one at all.

283
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:32,846
Dongs.
The answer is dongs.

284
00:13:32,946 --> 00:13:35,949
C'mon, Oleg,
I mean nobody can say for sure

285
00:13:36,083 --> 00:13:39,352
that Madonna
doesn't have one.

286
00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:42,489
Dongs aren't the answer
to everything.

287
00:13:42,589 --> 00:13:44,224
I used to think that.

288
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:45,959
You know where that got me?

289
00:13:46,093 --> 00:13:50,230
Pennsylvania,
with no car.

290
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:53,500
Schwarzenegger's is big,
Fox's is small.

291
00:13:53,633 --> 00:13:56,503
It's last names.
The Pope doesn't use his.

292
00:13:56,603 --> 00:13:58,906
Madonna doesn't have one at all.
That's it!

293
00:13:59,006 --> 00:14:01,975
Correctamundo.
[chuckles]

294
00:14:02,075 --> 00:14:03,276
With your brain power,

295
00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:06,246
you'll be out of here
in under an hour.

296
00:14:06,379 --> 00:14:07,915
Well, thanks,
but if I was that smart,

297
00:14:08,015 --> 00:14:09,182
I wouldn't have spent
the last four years

298
00:14:09,282 --> 00:14:12,986
getting ripped off
by my roommate.

299
00:14:13,086 --> 00:14:16,289
Oh, come on,
are you still on the money?

300
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:18,525
Oh, my God,
my sister lost both her thumbs

301
00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:19,492
in a combine accident

302
00:14:19,592 --> 00:14:23,931
and she didn't talk
about it this much.

303
00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:25,865
Ah, here's $25.

304
00:14:25,999 --> 00:14:27,200
Let's call it hush money,

305
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,602
so hush.

306
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:34,874
First of all,
this is $12,

307
00:14:34,975 --> 00:14:36,276
and fine,

308
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:38,211
you won't hear
a peep out of me anymore.

309
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:41,481
Fine, I don't care
if we never get out.

310
00:14:41,581 --> 00:14:44,551
[monkey screeching]

311
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:49,556
All right, FYI,

312
00:14:49,689 --> 00:14:55,228
yeah, Oleg and I are gonna get
really Amsterdam-y up in here.

313
00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:58,298
All right,
we gotta get the hell out.

314
00:15:03,370 --> 00:15:06,173
Come on, Caroline.
Where's your sense of whimsy?

315
00:15:06,273 --> 00:15:08,041
And don't say Max stole it,

316
00:15:08,141 --> 00:15:10,577
because that's getting older
than Randy's accent.

317
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:15,315
Sorry, Randy, I knew you were
a safe person to slam.

318
00:15:15,448 --> 00:15:18,318
Time moves forward.
It doesn't go back.

319
00:15:18,451 --> 00:15:22,655
You've got 15 minutes.
It's 45 that you lack.

320
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,091
[scoffs]
Come on, guys.

321
00:15:24,191 --> 00:15:25,925
We don't need Caroline
to solve these puzzles.

322
00:15:26,059 --> 00:15:27,627
This is the same team
that was able

323
00:15:27,727 --> 00:15:28,996
to figure out
the Wi-Fi password

324
00:15:29,096 --> 00:15:32,932
to the women's shelter
next to the diner.

325
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:34,934
Who said this?

326
00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:36,069
"If it was so,
it might be;

327
00:15:36,203 --> 00:15:38,671
and if it were so,
it would be."

328
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:41,941
The fat twins?

329
00:15:42,042 --> 00:15:42,976
'Cause that made no sense

330
00:15:43,843 --> 00:15:46,513
and they look like
they get stoned a lot.

331
00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:48,948
[monkey screeching]

332
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:52,085
Okay, Oleg,
drop your pants.

333
00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:55,355
The monkey wants his banana.

334
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:56,956
Caroline,

335
00:15:58,158 --> 00:15:59,226
if I have to see Oleg so much
as honk one of her boobs,

336
00:15:59,326 --> 00:16:00,994
I'm gonna lose it.

337
00:16:01,094 --> 00:16:03,663
I would help you,
and be your heaven-sent,

338
00:16:03,763 --> 00:16:08,401
but you screwed me on the rent.

339
00:16:08,501 --> 00:16:11,404
What is it gonna take
to make you get over this?

340
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,575
You haven't even apologized.

341
00:16:15,675 --> 00:16:18,511
Okay.
I am sorry.

342
00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:21,114
Are we good?

343
00:16:21,214 --> 00:16:23,016
You know what?
No, we not good.

344
00:16:23,116 --> 00:16:25,185
(all)
Aw, come on!

345
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:28,421
Fine, I'm the only one here
who knows this story,

346
00:16:28,521 --> 00:16:30,423
and I'm the only one who knows
how to get out of here.

347
00:16:30,523 --> 00:16:34,594
There, the rabbit hole,
Alice went down and so will I.

348
00:16:34,694 --> 00:16:36,129
That's it.

349
00:16:36,229 --> 00:16:39,466
This is a bigger bust
than Max's future.

350
00:16:39,566 --> 00:16:42,035
Just like Alice,
I'm sick of being stuck

351
00:16:42,135 --> 00:16:43,536
in this upside-down world

352
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:46,139
when your best friend
lies about the rent.

353
00:16:46,273 --> 00:16:47,440
- No, you can't!
- Oh, yes, I can.

354
00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:48,675
I bid you adieu.

355
00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:50,443
No, seriously,
don't!

356
00:16:54,081 --> 00:16:57,317
Ooh, I'm next!

357
00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:59,552
I don't mean
to burst your bubble,

358
00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:02,155
but your friend's in
a lot of trouble.

359
00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:04,023
What I'm saying is:

360
00:17:04,124 --> 00:17:06,159
that's not part of the room.
That's just for show.

361
00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:08,095
You're not supposed
to jump in it.

362
00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:10,163
I'm not next.

363
00:17:10,297 --> 00:17:13,032
So that's not
a cute rabbit hole?

364
00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:15,102
Rabbits?
No.

365
00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:16,103
Couple of rats, though.

366
00:17:16,203 --> 00:17:19,372
This place is
a deathtrap.

367
00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:21,608
Caroline,
please tell me you're okay.

368
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:24,043
(Caroline)
I can't, because I'm not.

369
00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:27,046
I'll use the emergency code
to get us out of here.

370
00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:29,182
5...9...4...7.

371
00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:30,717
[alarm buzzes]

372
00:17:30,850 --> 00:17:32,319
Okay, I'm gonna be real honest
with you right now.

373
00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:34,654
I don't know the codes.

374
00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:37,090
(Caroline)
Help, there's something
moving down here!

375
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:38,525
I'm going in.

376
00:17:38,625 --> 00:17:40,059
Sophie, give me
the pepper spray flashlight.

377
00:17:40,193 --> 00:17:41,094
All right, yeah.

378
00:17:41,194 --> 00:17:42,795
Hurry!
[pepper spray fizzes]

379
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:46,065
That really does sting.

380
00:17:46,199 --> 00:17:49,068
[monkey screeching]

381
00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:52,071
Okay, Oleg,
now it's time.

382
00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:53,506
It's that beautiful moment

383
00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:55,475
where you and I
are gonna make a baby

384
00:17:55,608 --> 00:17:59,078
right in front of
your coworkers.

385
00:17:59,179 --> 00:18:00,113
Can we have a little more class

386
00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:03,150
and wait till
we get in the cab?

387
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:04,284
What?

388
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:06,219
We're gonna do it
on top of teacups.

389
00:18:06,319 --> 00:18:07,487
That's pretty classy.

390
00:18:11,224 --> 00:18:12,125
[grunts and moans]

391
00:18:12,225 --> 00:18:13,493
What is happening?

392
00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:14,527
You know what?

393
00:18:15,395 --> 00:18:17,230
Spray some of
that stuff in your mind.

394
00:18:17,330 --> 00:18:18,431
Max, look.

395
00:18:18,531 --> 00:18:21,168
Oh, that's why his leg's
up in the air.

396
00:18:21,268 --> 00:18:24,804
I've seen enough.
I'm out.

397
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:26,306
[shrieks]
Ow!

398
00:18:26,406 --> 00:18:29,242
Ugh, I think I landed
on what was moving.

399
00:18:29,342 --> 00:18:31,244
So that's dead now.

400
00:18:31,378 --> 00:18:33,112
Oh, my God.
Are you okay?

401
00:18:33,213 --> 00:18:34,847
Yeah, I think.
Are you?

402
00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:36,249
Yeah.

403
00:18:36,349 --> 00:18:38,251
Wait, you said
you weren't okay.

404
00:18:38,351 --> 00:18:41,254
I meant emotionally.

405
00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:44,157
I jumped into a floor hole
for feelings?

406
00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:46,193
Well, my feelings
are really hurt, Max.

407
00:18:46,293 --> 00:18:47,394
It's been four years.

408
00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:48,528
Well, I don't know
what to do,

409
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,597
because like
the Sad Hatter said,

410
00:18:50,697 --> 00:18:53,132
time goes forward;
it doesn't go back.

411
00:18:53,266 --> 00:18:54,467
I can't undo the rent thing.

412
00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:56,336
I just thought
we were in this together,

413
00:18:56,436 --> 00:18:57,404
50/50.

414
00:18:57,504 --> 00:18:58,405
We are,

415
00:18:59,306 --> 00:19:00,273
and I should have told you
four years ago,

416
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,275
but I thought we wouldn't
last a month.

417
00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:04,577
But then we did,
and then another month,

418
00:19:04,677 --> 00:19:07,214
and I'm still not sure
how this happened:

419
00:19:07,314 --> 00:19:09,349
we became best friends.

420
00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:12,219
Max, that's the first time
you've ever called me

421
00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:13,820
your best friend
without a bribe,

422
00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:17,190
and that's worth
a lot more than money,

423
00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:19,292
and you know how
much I love money.

424
00:19:19,392 --> 00:19:22,295
Yeah, you almost ruined
our friendship over it.

425
00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:24,197
All right, come on,
let's get out of here.

426
00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:26,633
Ow!
Ow, ow, ow!

427
00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:27,567
I'm not okay.

428
00:19:28,301 --> 00:19:29,836
Searing pain,
searing pain.

429
00:19:29,969 --> 00:19:33,706
Ugh, I think I twisted my ankle
when I jumped down here.

430
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,175
Oh, my God.
I am so sorry.

431
00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:37,477
You're right.

432
00:19:37,577 --> 00:19:39,312
Sometimes sorry
just doesn't cut it.

433
00:19:39,446 --> 00:19:41,180
So how are we gonna get
you out of here?

434
00:19:41,281 --> 00:19:42,349
If you want me to carry you,

435
00:19:42,449 --> 00:19:45,218
you'll have to
take off your boobs.

436
00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:46,853
Which way should we go?

437
00:19:46,953 --> 00:19:49,656
My sense of direction led me
to being a waitress in Brooklyn.

438
00:19:49,756 --> 00:19:51,358
You know what?
Let's go forward.

439
00:19:51,458 --> 00:19:53,593
'Cause much like the time,
you can't go back.

440
00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:55,862
Also, the moving thing
just came to and looks mad.

441
00:19:55,995 --> 00:19:58,398
Go.

442
00:19:58,498 --> 00:20:01,768
Max, I've never been this close
to your butt before,

443
00:20:01,868 --> 00:20:03,636
and it's spectacular!

444
00:20:03,736 --> 00:20:05,272
What's your secret?

445
00:20:05,372 --> 00:20:08,675
I'm 27.

446
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:10,410
(Sophie and Oleg)
[moaning and grunting]

447
00:20:10,510 --> 00:20:14,747
(Han)
I really shouldn't
be seeing this.

448
00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:17,484
(Earl)
Can we please turn
the lights back off?

449
00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:19,786
(Sophie)
Oh, God, help me!

450
00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:21,754
Well, one good thing
about being down here:

451
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:24,357
Sophie and Oleg are up there.

452
00:20:24,491 --> 00:20:27,294
Wait, why is the floor sagging?

453
00:20:27,394 --> 00:20:32,265
[both screaming]

454
00:20:32,365 --> 00:20:33,633
Oh, my God.

455
00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:36,303
You know,
I'm pretty sure that fall

456
00:20:36,403 --> 00:20:40,273
knocked the baby
right up into me.

457
00:20:40,373 --> 00:20:43,843
Correction,
if I could turn the clock back,

458
00:20:43,943 --> 00:20:47,780
I wouldn't go back four years.
I'd go back 30 seconds.

459
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:52,385
[rock music]

460
00:20:52,519 --> 00:21:00,527
*